Project update 18/08

It’s been a while since I last talked about the progress of my various writing projects. So let’s do that today.

Singularity

My completed novel hasn’t been touched for a while. I stopped querying it a while back because I was only getting form rejections which led me to wonder if there might be something seriously wrong with something in the first three chapters. I intend to review it, fix it and then query some more but so far I’ve been to busy with other projects. In the long term I might have to self publish it because it’s so hard to market books that straddle multiple genres.

Project Kindness

Now exists as a complete Beta Version 3.1. I have a couple of beta readers looking at it but I don’t really have a timetable on preparing it to query agents. Sadly the complete version is too long and, at the time of writing, I have to cut 17,500 words from it. That’s quite a lot to cut, even from a novel that’s over 100,000 words.

I’m pretty pleased with it as it stands so I’m not looking forward to having to cut that many words. Of course the benefit of it is that it means that I can put of querying it and the inevitable rejection that will bring since, just like Singularity, it straddles genre. You’d think suave British spies vs Celtic gods would be an easy sell but I am 90% sure that it won’t be.

Project Academy

The young adult urban fantasy novel that I worked on last NaNoWriMo has been largely lying dormant since then. Now that I’ve finished the most recent re-write of Project Kindness and it’s too early to start work on this year’s NaNoWriMo novel I’m going through the first draft with a view to putting together an outline for the rewrites.

I feel pretty optimistic about it. The characters are great, the scenes and plot that I already have are pretty good and I think this novel has genuine potential. The publishing industry seems to be less nervous about contemporary fantasy in YA novels so maybe there’s some hope for traditional publishing with this one.

Project Locke

This is the working title for the novel I’ll be working on during NaNoWriMo 2019. It’s still in the very early stages but I took a gamble and submitted it to the Bloody Scotland Pitch Perfect competition. I didn’t get through but then I wasn’t really expecting too because although it is a detective novel it’s a sci fi detective novel.

I’ve got a lot of reading and outlining and world building to do before November. So far I’ve got some character names, some backstory, a chunk of plot and a part of a playlist. Here’s a little teaser for anyone who’s interested.

Fifty years into the future. Jack is a decorated veteran working on a memoir of heroism and debauchery. The heroism was mostly other people’s; the debauchery was all his own. After spending most of his advance an old friend introduces him to someone looking for a flat share. Locke is a skinny collection of maladaptive coping mechanisms. She’s completely immune to Jack’s charms and terrifyingly bright but also barely capable of looking after herself. Desperate for a distraction from his memoir Jack follows Locke into an investigation of a seemingly harmless new religious movement that nearly gets them both killed.

Other Writing

There’s nothing new to say about Project Cecil or Project Dingo and I have no immediate plans to work on either of them. I wrote an essay about pregnancy for a body positivity website and I even got paid for it but as far as I know it hasn’t been published anywhere yet so I can’t link to it.

I keep thinking that I should make more effort to find freelance writing work but I don’t have much idea how to do that, I’m worried about getting sick and letting people down and I’m scared it will leave me too tired to work on my other writing.

I might be about to start writing more here. I stopped writing the Zeppelin Watch stuff because it hurt too much to contemplate how fucked we all are by our precipitous slide into an alternative reality from the dreams of someone who read too many Commando comics when they were growing up. However I have recently returned to those sorts of posts because not even I can mope forever.

Other stuff

I’m still trying to find some way of generating an income but there’s nothing on the horizon. I have no idea how to set up a Patreon that would actually make money. I’ve looked into selling t-shirts but the shipping costs charged by drop shippers are so high that very few people would pay them. Once again I’m stuck in a position where I can’t get to where I want to be if I start from where I am.

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Zeppelin Watch Sunday 11th August

Welcome to the new reality. Everyone believes in conspiracy theories, nobody is sure what’s going on and we’re all very tired.

Beyond the Zeppelin image this post will feature discussion of suicide. Please don’t read on if you’re likely to find this painful or upsetting.

This week convicted pedophile and panderer to the stars, Jeffrey Epstein, either committed suicide while in Federal Prison and under suicide watch, faked his own death, or was murdered. If he died his death is either an indictment of the cruelty and incompetence of the US prison system or proof that the old skills haven’t died and there are still people out there doing proper assassinations. Even if he wasn’t murdered he might have been manipulated into killing himself in order to protect his friends. Or maybe his death was faked and he was spirited out of prison and is now on Elon Musk’s* secret orbital base.

His death denies closure to his victims. We should remember that in the coming weeks as the conspiracy theories proliferate. Everything we know about his network, his friends, and the crimes that he committed and facilitated we know because these brave women would not be silenced.

Some people are sure that Trump is behind the death/faked death and some suggest the Russians did it on his behalf. Some people say this is another Clinton hit. Some blame the British Royal Family because Prince Andrew has been accused of sexual assault by a couple of the Epstein victims.

The question I find myself asking is why would any of them bother? There are no consequences for people like that. Trump is Teflon. He could admit to rape or murder on camera and it wouldn’t cost him any support. The Clintons have weathered worse than this before and the Royals have the option of either ignoring the whole thing or jettisoning Prince Andrew to keep the institution intact.

It’s almost tempting to ask what Epstein knew that made him worth killing since it clearly wasn’t anything we’ve heard about so far. Tempting, but not a road that I’m willing to go down. That way lies madness.

So we now live in a world where “Epstein wasn’t murdered because no-one cares whether the President of the United States (current or former) was involved the sexual abuse of trafficked minors” is a rational position to take.

Some people are wondering how Epstein could possibly have commited suicide when he was supposed to be on suicide watch. Well that happens all the time. Relibly preventing suicide requires hard work, compassion, vigilence and above all competance.

Increasingly both the UK and the US are kleptocracies and kleptocracies are not known for promoting competence. That’s not what’s required to prosper in a kleptocracy. The qualities that are rewarded under kleptocratic rule are things like useful incompetence, ruthlessness, pragmatism, cruelty, cowardice, dishonesty and sycophancy.

The possessed mannequin that is our current Prime Minister is a perfect example of the kleptocrat. He’s a lazy, venial incompetant whose fondness for big words could fool someone who wasn’t paying attention into believing that he’s fairly bright. His sole genius is the realisation that when you’re a rich, straight, white dude people will give you the benefit of the doubt: as long as you give them the impression that your malicious actions might actually spring from ignorance, incompetence or laziness they’ll pick whichever is the least damning. And that’s the man that’s running the UK.

Truly we live in the stupidest timeline.

*Not that I’m suggesting that Elon Musk was a ‘friend of Epstein’. He’s just the first person who came to mind who might have a secret orbital base.

Update 04/08 -Wall of Mediocrity

This week has been a weird one for my writing. After several weeks of actual productivity I slammed into a wall composed of mediocrity. Specifically my mediocrity.

One of the problems of writing is that you often have to write about people doing things and experiencing things that you yourself have no knowledge of. That’s almost the whole point of both writing and reading.

Usually I can just project myself into my characters. I can ask myself “What if I…?” and when I can’t do that I can take someone I know as a template and say “What if they…?” But there are limits. Sometimes your characters get into a situation that is so removed from your reality that you might as well be trying to write in another language.

This week I have been trying to write a scene in which a man seduces a Goddess. A man that I’ve been setting up for a whole novel as a legendary seducer, a man of great charm. And this should be his greatest triumph. To sweet talk a Goddess of battle. And then I got to the scene and realised a few things.

I have no idea what constitutes seductive. When I want to charm someone I have to deploy a combination of cleavage and beer. Nobody has ever tried to seduce me and if they did I would excuse myself to the bathroom and then sneak out because if someone is trying to seduce me then it is definitely a set up of some kind. So I can’t ask myself what I would do or what would work on me.

I can’t rely on my wide experience of fiction because I don’t watch or read a lot of romance. I don’t have anything against it but it doesn’t do much for me. I’ve been trying to think of the seduction scenes from other genres of fiction but it’s hard to think of anything that’s not at least one out of creepy, abusive or really context specific.

In the end one of my other characters decided to save me by throwing himself on the plot in the way some people would throw themselves on a grenade. He did something epicly stupid and part of me is saying, “Oh, hun, no,” and part of me is steeping my fingers, leaning back in my chair and saying “Excellent, I’m going to make you regret that in the sequel.”

And after all that I’ve spent most of today wondering if can get away with cutting the entire scene out.

The other thing that happened this week was that I received the terrible news that I can never hope to be published because I don’t have the right education. Apparently if I don’t take courses in Journalism, Copywriting and Expository Prose then I cannot hope to stand out in the crapshoot that is querying. I’m not sure that’s true but then what would I know. I don’t even have a degree.

In all seriousness, I’d love to study writing properly but there are several problems with that. The biggest problem is that it’s not free to study and I am poor. There’s also the problem of my chronic ill-health. That means that I can’t just go out and earn the money to pay for study. Then there’s the problem that I only have so many spoons in a day and if I spend them all on studying then I’ll have to stop doing everything that isn’t studying.

I can’t believe that I was ever foolish enough to think that our society might be even slightly meritocratic.

And speaking of false meritocracy yes I am still salty about Boris fucking Johnson. I’ve spent my entire life feeling lazy and stupid and just not good enough. I have obsessed over every flaw and failure no matter how trivial. I have felt constantly unworthy. And now my country is run by a semi-sentient haystack in a badly fitting suit who is too fucking dense to pretend not to be a racist, entitled arsehole for ten minutes at a time.

But apparently that’s all ok because he knows all those fancy words and he’s promised to deliver Brexit. What a pity that he doesn’t seem to know how that’s going to work.

You realise, of course, that we are all fucked.

Update Fail – The stupidest timeline

This post should have been up on Sunday. I started to write it in plenty of time but I it’s just too depressing thinking about the state of the world at the moment. I’d blame Boris Johnson but I think he’s just a symptom of a larger problem. However it is very therapeutic to rail against him so I might try and write something later this week dedicated to that awful midden fire of a man. Anway, on to the update.

I think it’s time we took a look at the state of the world. I haven’t done one of those for a while because it’s all just too horrible but I think it’s time.

In the United States Donald Trump is somehow still the president. ICE (Imigration and Customs Enforcement) seems to have started modeling itself on the Gestapo and there are thousands of people in camps on the southern border. The mainstream news media has reacted to this by arguing with itself about whether we can call the camps ‘concentration’ camps or not. While journalists argue people die but they’re brown people and none of them are fetuses so no-one in power seems to be willing to do anything.

American law enforcement agencies may be almost ready to admit that the right wing identitarian groups they’ve been relying on to keep them informed about ANTIFA might actually be the real terrorists. Or maybe not since the republican party has taken time out of their busy schedule of arseholery and gerymandering to suggest that ANTIFA be defined as a terrorist organisation in spite of not actually being an organisation.

Britain has a new Prime Minister. I was not expecting to see Worzel Gummidge’s stupidest head running the country but here we are. Of course he’s calling himself Boris Johnson but he’s been sacked from various jobs in both politics and journalism for lying so who are you going to believe: me or him? As an aside how bad a liar do you have to be to be too bad for both journalism and politics?

I’d like to think that putting this homunculus in charge will inevitably lead to Scottish Independence. He’s everything about Westminster politics that annoys the Scottish Electorate and he’s not competent enough to stop the Scottish Parliament if it makes up it’s mind. But he is also ruthless enough to send in the troops and craven enough to suck up to Trump for help.

The entire new cabinet is almost a caricature of awfulness. It seems to be entirely made up of people with a proven track record of failure in the very areas they’ve been promoted to. Rik Mayall must be spinning in his grave that he’s not around to resurrect Alan B’Stard one last time.

Europe has been suffering through record high temperatures. It’s not just the heat it’s the humidity and the duration of the heatwave. I’m 47 and I’ve never seen anything like it but it’s really just last year’s heatwave scaled up. This is the new normal. This is a climate crisis.

At the same time as Europe has been baking in the sun, parts of the Arctic are burning. The permafrost is melting, releasing methane, a powerful greenhouse gas. That can’t possibly be good.

I don’t know how to wrap this post up. It’s tempting to say that our systems no longer work but actually they are working exactly as they’re supposed to. They protect the wealthy and the powerful and the rest of us can go hang.

Sunday Update 21/07 – Productivity!

Last week I wrote about using an arbitrary deadline to power through and finish the FIGHT SCENE FROM HELL. I finished it as planned and sent it to my friend. That’s not the important bit. The important bit is that finishing the scene unlocked a whole bunch of other scenes allowing me to fix several continuity problems and change the order of earlier scenes.

Sometimes that’s the thing with creativity. Sometimes what you need is to try something different, sometimes you need a break, and sometimes what you need is an incentive to care less about quality and just finish the thing.

Finishing one thing allowed me to go back and care about the quality of the other things. Project Kindness isn’t finished but it’s a lot closer than it was two weeks ago. Of the seven parts I’ve divided it into, five are finished and polished, one will be finished tonight and the remaining one could be finished in the next couple of weeks. There are two or three scenes that need to be written or extensively rewritten and everything else just needs smoothed out and possibly reordered. Then it could actually be finished.

I think. I’ve been wrong about that before.

The weird thing about looking back on your own writing is that it’s one part ‘this is brilliant, what genius wrote this’, one part ‘this is trash, what idiot wrote this’, and one part ‘this makes no sense, what the hell was I thinking,’. Or that’s how it feels. If I were capable of being truly objective it would probably be mostly fairly competent, some absolute rubbish and all the continuity problems associated with making shit up as you go along.

Going back over the old stuff is a little like collaborating with myself. Sometimes I just have to have faith that old me knew what she was doing when she laid down this plot and picked those characters and wrote that dialogue. And sometimes she clearly didn’t and I have to clean it up or delete it and come up with something better.

I’m so close to the end of this thing but I have absolutely no idea if it’s any good. I can point at individual lines and say that they’re good, sometimes even whole scenes, but when it comes to the plot or the premise or the character arcs I just can’t tell any more. I’m too close to it.

That’s why it’s so hard to finish stuff. And why it’s so hard to show stuff to people. Both of those steps involve confronting the painful truth that your stuff may not be any good while at the same time requiring you to believe that it’s good enough to finish and show to people.

Review: Spider-man Far From Home

The first part of this review will be spoiler free and there will be a large spoiler break image so that you can’t possibly accidentally read anything you don’t want to. However it will include mild spoilers for Avengers:Endgame. I’ll redact heavy Endgame spoilers and any huge Far From Home reveals even beyond the spoiler break.

One of the first questions that people ask about any film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe is, “Which other films do I need to watch before I can watch this one?” In this case the answer may be, “None”.

Spider-man: Far From Home is an oddity. It stands on the shoulders of 23 other films, it’s the direct sequel of Spider-man: Homecoming, it directly references events in Avengers: Infinity War and Avengers: Endgame but you don’t really need to have seen any of those to enjoy it. It stands alone as a mostly self contained narrative.

There are some things that you need to know in order to enjoy it but they’re mostly already out in pop culture. Just in case I have some followers who’ve recently emerged from a bunker he’s what you need to know about the MCU in order to enjoy Spider-man: Far From Home

  1. There are superheroes
  2. One of them is called Spider-man
  3. His real name is Peter Parker
  4. He’s being raised by his Aunt May because his parents are dead.
  5. Peter has spider-like abilities – he’s super strong and agile and can stick to any surface
  6. He’s also really smart and made ‘webshooters’
  7. There was a hero called Iron Man.
  8. His real name was Tony Stark.
  9. He was very rich and very smart and kind of a dick.
  10. He was Peter’s mentor and built him some cool tech to make him even more super.
  11. Tony is no longer around.

Everything else you need to know about will be explained in enough detail within the film. Even complicated, world altering events are dealt with. You’ll enjoy the film more if you watch Spider-man: Homecoming because you’ll have a better understanding of who the supporting cast are but it won’t make a huge difference. And if you want to understand why everyone is making such a huge fuss over this Tony dude you might want to watch the films he’s in but that’s a lot of films and if you don’t then you have to judge Tony based on his legacy as shown within the film and that’s no bad thing.

The next question about Spider-man: Far From Home is, “Should I watch it?” The answer depends on the kinds of film you like. Do you like action movies? Are you ok with superpowers in a film? Do you like jokes in your action movies? Do you like coming of age stories? If you answered yes to these questions then you probably should watch it.

But what if you have Marvel Fatigue? What if you’ve watched all the MCU films so far and you’re just tired after Avengers:Endgame? What if you found certain aspects of Endgame to be problematic and tiring (looking at you Fat Thor and your comedy PTSD and fat shaming and also at the fridge that they put [REDACTED] in)?

I can’t guarantee that you’ll enjoy Far From Home but I think that you probably will. For all that it deals with some pretty heavy stuff it has a much lighter tone than any of the Avengers movies. It manages to be super wholesome towards its characters and it’s free of the most problematic elements of Endgame.

And now it’s time for spoilers.

It’s interesting to me to imagine the picture you’d get of Tony Stark if you did watch this film without watching the rest of the MCU. There’s been a strong suggestion throughout the rest of the films that Tony is the secret and accidental villain of the MCU thus far. And here we are again watching our hero deal with the unintended consequences of Tony’s actions.

If you watch the film without watching the rest of the MCU first then you’re not blinded by Robert Downey Junior’s charisma or Tony’s heroic actions. You would have to judge him based on the actions that we see or hear about in the film – building something as dangerous as E.D.I.T.H., entrusting it to a teenager, mentoring Peter, using cutting edge holograph technology to make a therapy device, firing the people that he fired.

But you’d also have to judge Tony by his friends and enemies. Happy Hogan was Tony’s best friend and we see what kind of man Happy is and what he thought of Tony. Peter looked up to Tony and feels unworthy of his legacy and we see what kind of boy Peter is. [REDACTED] hates Tony and we see what kind of person they are, we see how willing they are to kill innocent people and terrorise their own allies.

What do you think?

Sunday Update 14/07 – totally not procrastinating

This week I have found a new weapon in the ongoing battle against procrastination. Well… I say I found it. It was really my friend, Vanessa Robertson.

I have long advocated for the use of arbitrary deadlines as a creative tool. That’s why I’m so committed to NaNoWriMo – an arbitrary deadline with community support and accountability built in – it’s perfect for me and I know it works for a lot of writers. But sometimes I’m not very good at applying my own advice.

I’ve been working on the FIGHT SCENE FROM HELL for months. I’m currently on approximately the 9th rewrite. I’m at the stage of this draft of Project Kindness where I can’t proceed with the draft without finishing the FIGHT SCENE FROM HELL and I really need to finish this draft. The scene wasn’t going anywhere and I’ve been complaining about it online and in person for almost as long as I’ve been writing it.

Vanessa, who isn’t one of my regular beta readers, offered to take a look at it, to see if it made sense even when stripped of context. But I can’t send it to her until it’s a complete scene. And I’ve agreed to send it to her tonight. So it had better be a complete scene.

The arbitrary deadline is working. Last night I finished the writing bit of the rewriting. Now I just have to assemble the parts. I’m not claiming that it’s any good but it is written and that’s the first stage in being good.

Also this week I went to see Spider-Man: Far From Home with my son and my other half. No spoilers here (I’ll post about it in more detail in a few days) but I do recommend it for everyone who likes superhero movies. I’ve you like Endgame then you probably need to see it and if you found certain aspects of Endgame to be problematic you might find Far From Home a refreshing change. I also recommend it if you enjoyed the lighter tone of films like Captain Marvel or Thor: Ragnarok or if you’d like to see Nick Fury get more screen time.

Sunday Update 07/07 – Bullet Journal

This week in my never ending and so far largely fruitless quest for organisation I’m having another bash at the Bullet Journal.

The Bullet Journal method is a very stripped down system for keeping a notebook that you actually use to stay on track. It works for a lot of people with ADHD and some people can be a tiny bit obsessive about it. That obsessiveness puts me off. It makes a notebook system seem like some weird lifestyle curse. One minute you’re fawning over the latest washi tape and the next you’re branding yourself with some dude’s initials.

The other thing that puts me off is the tendency to shorten it to BuJo which is an ugly ass word that reminds me of BoJo which in turn reminds me of Boris Johnson who, in turn, makes me boak*.

The weather this week as been glorious here in Scotland. Probably not so much farther south or in mainland Europe where I hear the heat has been lethally oppressive. I managed to get out of the house a couple of times but my photography skills seem to have abandoned me. I don’t think any of the photographs I took are worthy of sharing.

Also this week I’ve been hard at work on the fight scene from hell in Project: Kindness. I’ve been rewriting it again for what must be about the ninth time. I think I’m making progress. I’ve broken it apart and now I’m reassembling it and I think that once I get it back together and then write a couple of small pieces that I missed during the first 8 attempts then it might be ready to let other people look at it.

Once that scene is fixed I’ll be pretty close to finishing the whole thing. In theory. I keep thinking that I’m nearly finished and then I crest a metaphorical rise and see a whole new figurative mountain in front of me.

Looking ahead to next week it looks like my main tasks are going to be keeping up my bullet journal and finishing this damn scene. What else should I be focusing on?

*A charming Scots colloquialism usually meaning  to dry retch but can mean actually vomiting.

Sunday Update 30/06 – So done

This week I am completely fed up with my lipoedema. June is lipoedema awareness month so it’s in my mind more than usual. I’m reading about the experiences of other people with lipoedema and I am angry.

I’m angry about the fatphobia within the lipoedema community. I’m angry about the lack of treatment options. I’m angry at the RAD (Rare Adipose Disorder) Diet that is often suggested for people with lipoedema. I’m most angry at the more than 30 years I had to wait for a diagnosis. 30+ years of being blamed, and condescended to and diets that would never have worked and my body getting sicker and sicker and only being diagnosed in the end because I heard about lipoedema and asked about it.

Everything I read about lipoedema worries me more. It’s possible that I’ve already missed the cut-off point for surgery, that my lipoedema is already too bad for the only specialist surgeon in Scotland to consider me as a patient. That’s a hell of a thing to find out when you have a progressive condition. Without surgery my arms and legs will continue to get worse and I will get less and less mobile.

I’m not even on the waiting list to see the surgeon yet. I’m still trying to make compression garments work. I have to make them work if I want surgery because recovering from the surgery involves wearing compression 24 hours a day. It’s not going well.

I’ve been trying to make compression work for about a year and a half and it’s just been one failure after another. Currently I’m trying with velcro compression wraps in the hope that they’ll be easier to get on. They are easier to get on. But they’re virtually useless because they won’t stay up. They slide down to the point of uselessness in the distance between my armchair and the kitchen. If I can’t walk in compression then it’s not a solution.

The alternative is the compression garments that compress better but that I just can’t get on half the time. They destroy my fingernails and blister my knuckles when I do have the strength to pull them on but I often can’t pull them on because my triceps just give up. And I can’t wear them if I have to go anywhere because they slide down.

So I end up wearing sports compression leggings. Those are expensive, they don’t compress well enough and as my legs get worse I’ll eventually be too fat for them.

Maybe part of the problem is my mindset. I’m viewing my body as a problem to be solved and then feeling like a failure because I can’t work out how to solve it. Maybe there isn’t a solution? Maybe this is just a thing that has to be accepted? Maybe I should buy myself a sexy looking mobility scooter and stop worrying? As it is I’m going through a lot of pain and frustration to try and preserve mobility which might already be doomed.

Perhaps it’s time to stop trying to fix my body and start trying to fix my life. The important thing is where I’m going not how I get there. Is it really worse to get there using a mobility scooter or wheelchair rather than a walking stick? Perhaps I need to decide what I want to do and then work out what adjustments I’ll need to make in order to get there.

Sunday Update 23/06 – A dose of the sads

This week I finally got round to posting that Spoiler Club thing that I’ve been talking about. I think it’s good but it feels pointless. Everything is feeling pointless at the moment because I have a dose of the sads.

If I can be honest for a moment what I actually have is a flare up of my clinical depression which is not currently being actively treated because my local GP surgery seems to be paranoid about people wanting pills for everything. But I’m going to call it a dose of the sads because clinically diagnosed but untreated depression is the sort of thing that worries people, including me.

There’s no particular reason for this dose of the sads. There usually isn’t. It sometimes feels like something triggered it but I don’t think that’s what’s happening. My life is no more awful than it was last week but this week it’s harder to pretend that I don’t care.

Suddenly it’s hard to justify the amount of effort that goes into writing, both my novels and this blog, given how few people are ever going to see them. I know it’s hard to tell from the outside but I am actually trying to write well. And if you’re genuinely making the effort then bad writing is just as hard as good writing. In terms of the amount of enjoyment that I’ve created for the amount of effort involved my writing is not a good investment. I’m working really hard for something that will offer moderate enjoyment to maybe a dozen people. It doesn’t seem worth the trouble.

Of course the problem with the sads is that they make it feel like nothing is worth the trouble, up to and including breathing. Also, objectively, I put a lot of work into my writing and get virtually nothing back. It isn’t worth it but what else am I going to do with my time? I’m stuck here. I have to fill the unforgiving minute with something even if it’s just displacement activity to keep me from thinking about death.

Anyway, now that I’ve thoroughly depressed everyone including myself I’m looking for suggestions for the next installment of Spoiler Club. If you can think of something currently available on Netflix, Amazon Prime, or Shudder that I could take to pieces and reassemble then let me know in the comments.